Weird Science

Physics - My Pocket Wormhole.

Time and space seem to be bending around me in weird ways lately, most having to do with clocks. I've lost time frequently lately, and not just due to sleep or distraction. Case in point: This morning, I got up around 4:30. I know this because I looked at the time on my pager when I got up. As I was leaving the room to go and get a little exercize, K asked me what time it was. I turned and looked at her clock: 4:47 AM.

Now I know darn well it didn't take me 17 minutes to pull some shorts on and walk to the foot of the bed. I figured one of us had a clock set wrong. So, I headed downstairs. The time on the microwave said: 4:52. A full five minutes to walk maybe a total of 30 feet, down 6 steps and into the kitchen? I don't think so. I would normally have put the first lapse down to me falling back alseep and believing I got up normally. In this case, on the way downstairs, that was less likely. Something was amiss.

So I booted up the computer, and pulled up www.time.gov. Surely the government wouldn't lie to me. About the time, that is. The clock on the site said: 4:48. What the heck.

So, into the shower I go. I return upstairs around 5:22, according to my watch. My pager tells a different story, but it's only off by around a minute, and only differs from K's clock by about 2 minutes. I head back downstairs to pack up my food for the day, and find out that my watch and the microwave are in agreement. None of the devices, however, agree with the government. (Pretty standard for my house.)

And I'm late for work today. I blame wormholes.

Chemistry - A little food science.

Take about a quarter cup of pearl barley, rinse, towel dry, and roast it in a dry pan over medium heat until golden. Then boil it in 6 cups of water for 6 minutes. Strain the result through cheesecloth, squeezing out the liquid as much as possible.

Barley Tea. Not bad. Add milk and sugar (or honey and lemon) to taste.

Sociology/Psychology - Projection of Self Loathing.

I won't link it here, because I would shudder to give this person any more publicity than they deserve, but I heard the most disturbing anti-homosexuality song on Google Video yesterday. It was basically what sounded like an obviously gay man, pleading with Jesus to save him from his temptations, all the while singing about how god hates homosexuals. I have several takes on this, not the least of which is to have a good long laugh at someone who must hate in order to feel good about themselves. Though in another sense, it's quite sad that a person cannot be who he is, and must hate both others and himself in order to feel accepted by a certain group of people.

K, by far, had the clear winner for Quote of the Week: "Dude, you're so deep in the closet, you're in Narnia." I couldn't have said it better if I tried.

And with that, class dismissed.

-D.